Divorce rates are high and if you don’t want your spouse and yourself to become a statistic, there are things that you can do for your marriage. Marriage is not something to take lightly and neither is divorce. In order to keep your marriage strong, both partners must agree in what they want out of the marriage. The following are things you can do to help make your marriage the best that it can be.
The first thing you should be doing is communicating. Keeping your feelings inside is not going to help your spouse figure out either what they are doing wrong or what you wish they would do instead. Don’t be afraid to say what you want. If you need more cuddling time, let them know. Perhaps your spouse doesn’t really know what exactly you need out of your relationship? They do not have a crystal ball, so if you don’t tell them, it’s not going to happen. Every person has different needs, so never assume that your mate will know exactly what you need all of the time.
Taking time for your marriage is very important. So many people jump into marriage expecting it to be quiet nights by the fire and instead, it’s running around like a chicken with its head cut off. Between work, housework, errands, family get-togethers, and other responsibilities, there is not much time for each other. This is where date nights come in. A couple needs to spend time together and each couple should plan at least one night every two-weeks to spend the evening together. This means putting off phone calls, television, and sports for one night. Find something you both enjoy doing, such as going out to dinner, going to a concert, or even going to play golf together. Just make sure it is something you both want to participate in.
The next part is sharing your life. This is very close to the communication issue. Share things that went on with work with your partner. Share funny stories that happened to you during the day. This also includes sharing your hopes and dreams. When a couple shares with each other, they generally get to know each other in a more intimate way.
Another important part of marriage is knowing when you are wrong and knowing how to say you’re sorry. The important thing here is to be accountable for your actions and words and never be afraid to say you’re sorry. Nobody is perfect, including yourself or your mate. There are going to be times that you say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing and upset your partner. Say you’re sorry and mean it.
Remember that yelling does not work. When you yell, it immediately puts the other on the defense and you will not get what you want. All that you will end up doing is saying things you don’t mean and causing the other to say things that they do not mean. If it takes walking away from the argument to get your head together, do it. Tell them you simply need a few minutes and they will understand. They would much rather continue the conversation in a rational manner than have you screaming at them in their face.
Lastly, but definitely not the least, you need to compromise. No person ever gets their way all of the time and if they do, it just means the other half never gets their way. Their needs to be a balance of give and take.
If you can follow this, your marriage will become the best and most important part of your life. Don’t let the statistics get you down…marriage has been around a long time and if you take care of your partner’s needs, they’ll take care of yours.
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