TV Kills Marriages

TV is a wonderful distraction. It allows you to immerse yourself in the lives of fictional characters and real life drama whilst you put your own stress on hold for the evening. There are educational programs that are certainly worth watching, and there is really nothing wrong with a bit of escapism now and then. Your children are probably easily pacified with the TV and it may become a habit to distract them from their misbehavior with the television. But the TV can become a destructive force in marriages if you are not careful.

If you are using the TV to avoid thoughts of your day at work, this is escapism. You may need to use a light hearted comedy to unwind and get your mind off of the people and situations that are troubling you. However, if you use the TV to avoid dealing with certain situations at home, you are denying yourself true comfort. Avoiding conflict with your spouse by flipping on the television is only prolonging the issue, and it can be a clear signal of disrespect.

When you have an argument, retreating into the television may seem like an easy way to quell your anger and make the situation go away. But this is an illusion. The situation is not gone until you confront your emotions and have an honest conversation about the conflict. When you put off this conversation, you make your feelings worse. You may engender more resentment in your spouse by your procrastination. And further, by not dealing with your feelings, you are unable to learn what the true nature of the problem is.

So instead of turning on the TV next time you have an argument, try taking a walk or doing something constructive around the house until you cool off. Then when your emotions are less explosive, ask your spouse to sit down and discuss the issue with you. Your head will be clearer and you will be able to put the issue to rest without putting it off for days or even weeks thanks to the television.

TV programs are full of married couples who argue. Unfortunately, they are also full of married couples with deplorable communication skills. By watching TV on a regular basis, you may inadvertently pick up some of these communication techniques. This can be very harmful to your marriage. Snappy comebacks and sarcasm might make for funny dialogue, but these types of responses in a discussion at home can aggravate a tense situation. Sarcasm is a cutting method of saying something mean without actually saying the words. However, the message is still clear.

Rather than watching TV shows that demonstrate how not to communicate, try to find other activities in the evenings that foster positive communication. Spend some time together talking about the good aspects of your lives. This is especially important if you have children.

Dinner together at the end of the day can be an excellent opportunity for kids to tell you about their day. They may not be forthcoming at all times, but when they do feel like sharing, they will have a comfortable and open forum in which to do so. This type of regular and respectful communication is a great way to foster family closeness and to practice good relationship skills.

 

 

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